13 July - 16 July





Yesterday me and Nath arrived in Krakow, the Final Destination of my Four-Week European Tour. Since I know it'll make Paul laugh (especially considering what we talked about on MSN yesterday morning), I may as well start by relating the circumstances of our arrival.

I woke up yesterday morning feeling like shit - I had a runny nose, a headache and a sore eyebrow, since last night I went to bed in the dark (I didn't turn the light on coz everyone else was asleep), slipped while untying my shoelaces and smashed my face on the edge of a table, which gashed my eyebrow and gave me the novel experience of having blood running into my eye for the next 15 minutes. I gotta say, there's nothing like trying to sleep in a dorm listening to some British backpacker snore like a chainsaw, while dabbing at your eyebrow with toilet paper.... although now, at least, I look like a genuine Polish hooligan :-)

Anyway, we dragged our sleepy arses to Warszawa Centralna an hour before our train was due, so we wandered around, staring at all the policemen passing by (I swear, there must be about one policeman for every ten citizens in Warsaw) and eating chocolate. We did this for a full 50 or 60 minutes and then what did we do? We missed the train. Paul can testify as to how cryptic Polish train schedules can be, and basically I deciphered it incorrectly which meant that we were waiting on the wrong platform. By the time I realized that what I thought was the platform number was not actually the platform number, it was too late, so we had to wait for another hour before the next train to Krakow arrived. This wouldn't have been so bad except for the fact that this particular train went to Krakow via pretty much the rest of Poland -- the trip took forever and by the time we got to Krakow, with rain pouring down and everything grey and gloomy, I wasn't a particularly happy spring onion at all. So we walked down to the tram stop with me sneezing incessantly and blowing my nose on PKP toilet paper, the texture of which makes sandpaper feel like silk. When we got to the tram stop I asked the guy which tram goes to ulica Sliska (where our hostel is located); however, all I got in return was a useless mumbling imbued with the fragrance of alcohol - yes, the man responsible for selling tram tickets was drunk. Not a great start to our Krakow experience and, I have to say, not unlike the start me and Paul had last time we were here.

Of course, it's wonderful to be back in lovely old Krakow but at the same time, being in Poland is starting to stress me out a little, since inevitably it's up to me to take care of everything. Poles don't care much for speaking English (tourists are, I have to admit, sometimes treated as a mere nuisance), so I've been using Polish in all of my dealings here; something Nath has been quite happy about since he seems to be somewhat intimidated by Polish people. For example, yesterday night me and Nath went out to dinner with an Australian girl, a Croatian guy and a Swiss guy, and it was up to me to find a restaraunt and order everyone's meals and drinks. It was up to me to give coins to the beggar on the way there, and up to me to humour the drunk on the way to the car (the Croatian guy gave us a lift back to the hostel in his rented car). When me and Nath got interrogated at Warszawa Centralna earlier that arvo, it was up to me to deal with the two policemen as well:


Policeman 1: Can I see your documents?
Me: What?
Policeman 1: Can I see your documents.
Me: You mean like my passport?
Policeman 1: Yes.
Me: I don't have my passport; we're just here to buy tickets for the train tomorrow.
Policeman 1: [turns to Nath and says something]
Me: He doesn't speak Polish.
Policeman 2: Where have you come from?
Me: Amsterdam.
Policeman 1: Amsterdam?
Me: Yeah.
Policeman 1: Where are you going?
Me: We're here to buy tickets to Krakow tomorrow.
Policeman 1: How long have you been here?
Me: Well, we've been in Warsaw for three days and we're going to spend three days in Krakow.
Policemen 1: And then?
Me: And then we're flying back to Melbourne.
Policeman 1: Six days.... that's quite a short vacation, isn't it?
Me: Excuse me, but what's the point of all these questions?
Policeman 1: Nothing. Alright.
Me: Alright?


And I shook my head at them and left. Normally Polish policemen are pretty intimidating - big, shaved-headed guys with big boots and sub-machine guns - but these two guys were probably no older than me and Nath, obviously just out on a bit of a power trip.

Anyway the dinner (at a Polish restaraunt in the Old Town) was really good, but no-one was in the mood for drinking so, as I said, the Croatian guy drove us back to the hostel and everyone went to sleep. I didn't feel like going to bed yet so I went upstairs to get a drink and started debating with some random Danish fuckwit about Poland. The argument started when I asked him whether it was OK to drink tap water here; he answered no ("I got diarrohea for three days after drinking the water here") and somehow, from this, got onto the topic of how the undrinkable tap water here is a reflection of Poland's inefficient economy. I let this unnecessary comment pass but then, when he started complaining about how Polish people are all grumpy and obsessed with the past - well, I started firing back. The ironic thing is, as I listened to him whinge about all this shit he struck me as exactly the sort of grumpy, whining arsehole he was accusing Polish people of being, and so I started arguing back that I haven't found this to be the case at all and that, with the single exception of the British, western Europeans are noticably worse, with Austrians (and probably Germans) taking first prize for rudeness and grumpiness. The guy then changed the topic to Russia, condemning it as a "corrupt and dirty" place, yet when I asked Mr Lonely Planet whether he's actually been there what was his answer? "No, but that's what I've heard."

I swear, it never ceases to amaze me at how offensively naive and gullible western Europeans can be - Americans' and Australians' ignorance I can understand, considering that they're on the other side of the world (stupidity seems to be an American racial characteristic, at any rate), but how it is that western Europeans still believe in this Cold War propaganda about their eastern European neighbours? Honestly, you could tell these people that the Moon is a "dirty and corrupt" place too and they'd probably believe it. The funny thing is, an Asian guy sitting nearby started standing up for Poland too, saying that western Europe didn't appeal to him at all and that he's found eastern Europe to be a nicer and more hospitable place. So the Danish guy shut the fuck up and went back to scowling at the table, and, just to prove a point, I filled up a glass with tap water and skulled the whole lot in front of him. Sure enough, I didn't feel the slightest bit unwell at all.


Ummmm.... to be honest I'm not feeling very inspired to write anything at the moment; the main reason me and Nath are in here is coz it's pissing down heavily outside. If I can add one more observation about Poland though, it's that Polish people are unusually fond of flowers. Me and Paul didn't get to witness this in winter for obvious reasons, but now that it's summer here the cities are heavily adorned with flowers - take a look at my photos of Nowy Swiat for example, where the streets, shop-fronts and lamp-posts are all decorated with red and pink flowers. One thing that me and Paul DID notice when we were here (but which I don't think I mentioned in any e-mails) is that flowers are often used as a way of "garying" the opposite sex. Instead of getting so drunk that they don't feel inhibited about insulting and cracking onto a girl, guys in Poland usually purchase a single wrapped flower (designed for this very purpose) and present it to a girl they like, as a way of saying "I like you" or "Will you be my girlfriend?" Me and Paw witnessed this a number of times in clubs and in summer, this practice is particularly prevalent in parks and on market squares, where guys often go to court potential girlfriends in a romantic setting.

Anyway, I'm not sure if I've got the money to pay for any more Internet so I better pis off now.... see you all in a few days!


Pozdrawiam,


Mateusz



Czesc everyone!


Well, this is probably gonna be my last mass e-mail from Europe, and looking back on it all it's amazing how quickly the time's flown by. At the moment I'm by myself in an Old Town Internet cafe; Nath caught the bus to some random Polish town south of Krakow last night to meet up with some British backpackers we befriended back in Warszawa.... personally I wasn't up for leaving Krakow (especially considering our very limited time here), so I stayed back to join Ania and Wojtek for a few drinks in and around the Market Square.

Unfortunately, Wojtek had to cancel on me coz he remembered it was Ania's mum's birthday, so we're going to meet up for dinner tomorrow instead (and then, at 7 o'clock the next morning, me and Nath board the plane back to Melbourne).

Despite the cancellation, I decided to make the most of my time here in the Old Town, so I strolled around the Market Square taking in the vibrant late-afternoon atmosphere. In one area, a bunch of Polish youths were break-dancing for money ("We only accept gold coins and gold teeth!" the ringleader announced), while outside the Empik bookstore, a crowd of guys and girls were waiting for their dates and mates to show up, impatiently checking their mobiles and chewing gum (and yes, as usual there was plenty of ultra-fine puro). Little kids were chasing each other around the Adam Mickiewicz statue, and every now and then a horse-and-carriage would pass by, horse-shoes clomping loudly on the stone tiles. At eight o'clock, a small crowd gathered outside St Mary's Church to listen to the Hejnal, a bugle call sounded every hour in memory of a medieval bugler who, in order to warn Krakow's citizens of an impending Mongol attack, played the Hejnal from the tower of the church. He was shot in the throat by a Mongol archer before completing the sequence, and, to this day, the call is abruptly ended half-way.

As I took in all of these sights and sounds I really regretted not taking my camera, since the whole square was bathed in brilliant red sunlight (in summer, the sun starts to set at around eight o'clock). Oh and Paul, remember that busker who played all those cool dramatic songs on the accordian outside of St Mary's? Well, he started up again just as it got dark and, as we always did, I dropped him a couple of coins for his musical wizardy.

I was starting to feel kinda lonely once the darkness set in, so I left the Old Town and went for a walk along the Plantach (parkland) to ulica Sarego, where me and Paul lived for ten days at the start of this year. It made me feel somewhat nostalgic and I had to admit to myself, this trip hasn't possessed quite the same magic as the last one, which was like living a dream from the very first day in Vienna to our final hour in Prague. I guess there's a number of reasons for this: I think central Europe is a more exciting and atmospheric region than western or northern Europe, and I have to say that Paul himself, so enthusiastic about all things cultural and historical (not to mention alcoholic), was an integral aspect of that wonderful ten-week epic. Throughout this trip I've felt like I've been chasing that first high that you can never attain again once you've had it.... it's all too much to explain here, but as I slowly walked back to our hostel four kilometres away this is what was going through my head, and I wondered if there was anything left of the European Dream that bloomed and flourished just half-a-year ago.

Along the way, I passed a miserable-looking old man who was just standing there, wretchedly holding a bunch of withered-looking flowers for sale. As it was past midnight and he was obviously not gonna get any customers, I bought the flowers off him and kept on walking, feeling a little stupid since I had no-one to give them to. Eventually I just threw them into a bin and wondered if perhaps this action wasn't somehow symbolic; that all beautiful things must die or come to an end.... but anyway.

Me and Nath's time here, short-lived and seperated though it's been, has not been without the random moments that me and Paul always experienced back in December/January. For example, when me and Nath caught a taxi back on our first night here, we encountered the same problem that we'd encountered all throughout Warszawa -- the taxi driver didn't have enough change for our Western-tourist 100-zloty note. So off we went on a wild goose chase, trying to find a place that would give us change for the 100 zloty note -- first a parking attendant, then our hostel receptionist (who gave me detailed instructions on how not to get ripped off instead), a petrol station that was closing and, finally, good ol' trusty McDonalds. The time spent looking for a place to exchange the money took almost as long as the trip itself, and by the time he'd driven us back to our accommodation I could tell the driver was getting a little crusty. However, he was still polite when he dropped us off so I wished him a good night and gave him a generous tip.

There's no doubt that Poland is full of quirks such as this, and whether you treat them as funny experiences or annoying inconveniences is really up to one's attitude. I guess this is what the Danish guy I argued with didn't like about eastern Europe -- i.e., it's not as customer- or tourist-friendly as western Europe -- but for me, this is precisely what I love about it. Unlike the West, eastern Europe hasn't sold its soul to the tourism industry (by commercializing and sexifying everything), and you can truly immerse yourself in a genuinely foreign and uncorrupted culture, language and vibe, with all of those old-school peculiarities that give it flavour and authenticity.

Anyway, I better send this off and get onto the photos before it's time to meet up with Nath.... See you soon!


Mateusz


P.S. Paul, I'm sorry to say that I won't have any time to meet up with Justyna and Paulina this time round.... the only possible night was tonight and it's been taken up by Ania and Wojtek :-( It probably wouldn't've have worked out anyway since Justyna wanted to go to a club again and me & Nath have to be up early tomorrow morning.... however, she told me to say Hello to you from her and Paulina :-)



The twin spires of St Mary's Church. The Hejnal is sounded hourly from the higher tower.

In summer, the Market Square is always packed with tourists and tour groups.

Angry-looking woman wondering why I'm taking a photo of her - actually an attempt to capture the view from where me and Nath were sitting for lunch.

Cracovians love their bread rings and stalls like these can be found all around the city.

Equestrian statue of General Tadeusz Kosciuszko, champion of Polish and American independence.

Beautiful girls in a beautiful setting: this promenade runs through the Plantach (parkland) that surrounds the Old Town, and is a very popular destination for young lovers to spend time with each other.

Typical Old Town laneway, leading up to the Rynek (Market Square).

Working-class district in Krakow, where me and Nath's hostel was located. Features possibly the fastest trams in Europe.


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